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Forum "Korrekturlesen" - Letzter Teil Seminararbeit
Letzter Teil Seminararbeit < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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Letzter Teil Seminararbeit: Korrektur lesen
Status: (Frage) überfällig Status 
Datum: 16:17 Mo 01.05.2006
Autor: DGmanuelDG

Aufgabe
Dies ist der letzte Teil meiner Seminararbeit über IKEA (Erfolgsgehemnisse!)
Morgen ist Abgabetermin. Ich würde mich riesig freuen, wenn jemand bereit wäre meine Arbeit Korrektur zu lesen!

VIELEN DANK!:-)

The purchase strategy

Ikea is a global enterprise which refers just 9 per cent of its products from Sweden and economises a large portion of its costs by the production of its own and by the purchase of large quantities from cheap wage countries like China, Poland etc.
Ikea has around 46 one purchase offices in 32 countries which directly negotiate reasonable prices with the suppliers on the spot and checking the compliance with the code of conduct.
The sale of Ikea products takes place in countries with high wages so that a highest success can be achieved. In future the purchase is expanded in even cheaper countries, too. Moreover, Ikea does not buy all materials of the same manufacturer, but it also could be that one product is manufactured by materials from different countries


The immortality factor

The enterprise organisation

Ingvar Kamprad is being no more the owner of the IKEA Group today. Ingvar Kamprad saw the future endangered of Ikea, but he wanted that Ikea will remain an independent and immortal enterprise. Therefore he decided to transform the Ikea enterprise into a foundation. The foundation "Stichting INGKA foundation" is at the first job of this company structure. Managing director of the "Stichting INGKA foundation" is Ingvar Kamprad. This foundation is the owner of the "INGKA Holding B.V.". The "INGKA Holding B.V." is in turn the parent company of all enterprises of the Ikea group and Swedwoods' production factories.
Today Ikea is an idea, a concept. This concept is in the possession of the company "Inter IKEA system B.V." with seat in Holland. "Inter IKEA system B.V." was hence founded to sell usufructs at the idea of Ikea. One of the largest franchisees is the Ikea group itself.

Ikea is the worldwide tallest tax saver

Ingvar Kamprad tried to save taxes on the legal way so much so that the wish of independence does not remain an illusion for Ikea. The reason for it was the high tax burden in Swedes whom a corporation tax contains up to 70 per cent. Around this objective of reaching the global company and property structure contributed an essential role to it.
According to the fact that IKEA furnishing houses have to pay royalities to the "Inter IKEA System" the top management is able to save taxes by claiming higher royalities (by decreasing the assets). !!DIESER TEIL FEHLT NOCH!!

Sure, the "Coordination centre" also must pay taxes, but only a small fraction of the usual tax load, since this enterprise is in Belgium where the tax burden is only very little. A German tax expert had investigated once that the subsidiary firms just work with 0.2 per cent equity capital and 99.8 per cent outside capital. According to the "TV magazine" Ikea reduces its tax revenue by this enterprise constellation from 40% to 15%. Even managers must move their place of residence to save taxes.


The teflon factor and the social responsibility

Toxic substances

Ikea is often also described as a “Teflon Company” because almost all negative influences grease like on a Teflon stratum. At that time, it was noticed that an Ikea cupboard shelf called Billy contained an extraordinary high proportion of poisonous substances the Ikea management reacted immediately with a new more environmentally friendly production method. In the end, Ikea was well advised that it had not looked for justifications but after the cause of the problem.

Environmental protection

FEHLT NOCH!  Later, Ikea became a member of the environmental protection organisation "Natural Step". From this time on Ikea tries to take ecological points into account consideration at the production of the assortment. For this reason Ikea accepts in principle none wood more from intact nature woods. To comply with environmental tasks in future Ikea became a founder member of "Forest Stewardship Councils" Organisation, too. This organisation makes out certificates for an ecologically compatible forestry.
Ikea has even an "IKEA-Rail" of its own to keep the ecological damage low and to save carriage costs.
Kamprad and Hitler

However, Ingvar Kamprad had also a personally problem which he had to solve quickly so that Ikea did not carry damage of this. Ingvar Kamprad was namely in a new Swedish on the right oriented movement at earlier times, because he and his family were enthusiastic supporters of Hitler. At expense Kamprads this past became reality again and comparisons became in public drawn with Hitler-Germany and the Ikea culture. Therefore Ingvar Kamprad confessed his reference to the right hand and apologized afterwards to his employees with a personal letter and he talked publicly about his past. This reputation by repentance increased looking at the brand Ikea in another one positive dimension.


child labour

Ikea has built up a strong brand images within the last decades. As much more endangering for the reputation of Ikea was the public yell because of child labour which came to the light at Ikea. The problem lay mainly in it that Ikea could not ensure any full-coverage control of single enterprises. Consequently Ikea consulted the international child relief organization "Save The burden Children" and searched after solutions to handle this problem on the best and fast way. The solution was making a set of rules (code of conduct) named "The Ikea Way On Purchasing Home Furnishing Products" briefly, IWAY. This shall put social and ecological minimum requirements to the supplier and provide a moral adjustment on the market at the same time. A permanent examination of these minimum requirements is provided by Ikea purchase offices and various other control companies. Moreover, Ikea participates in UNICEF and sponsors numerous projects to fight child labour. This active encouragement on the part of Ikea got a very positive public resonance and promoted the good faith in the enterprise and the consistency between an enterprise fond of children and the prohibition of child labour.



Ich habe diese Frage in keinem Forum auf anderen Internetseiten gestellt.




        
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Letzter Teil Seminararbeit: Teilkorrektur
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 18:02 Mo 01.05.2006
Autor: claire06

The purchase strategy

Ikea is a global enterprise which refers

“refer” passt hier nicht. Es meint eher, sich auf etwas beziehen. “purchase” hingegen meint beziehen im Sinne von beschaffen und das ist wohl das, was du sagen möchtest.

just

Besser “only”

9 per cent of its products from Sweden and economises a large portion of its costs by the production of its own and by the purchase of large quantities from cheap wage countries

Die gängige Formulierung ist “low-wage country”

like China, Poland etc.

Ich glaube, der Satz ist so nicht falsch, aber ich hätte hier noch ne Alternative mit der schönen –ing Form, die hier prima passt: ;-)

„..a large portion of its costs by having its own production and by purchasing large quantities from low-wage countries”


Ikea has around 46 one purchase offices

Hm, was heißt denn “one purchase offices”?

in 32 countries which directly negotiate reasonable prices with the

Das “the” würde ich lieber weglassen. Es handelt sich ja hierbei um irgendwelche Lieferanten, nicht um bestimmte.


suppliers on the spot and checking the compliance with the code of conduct.

Was für Verhaltensregeln? Meinst du vielleicht so etwas wie die Incoterms? Du solltest das auf jeden Fall näher erklären.


The sale of Ikea products takes place in countries with high wages so that a highest success
can be achieved.

Der Satz klingt sehr umständlich. Vielleicht besser: In order to maximise profit IKEA products are sold in high-wage countries.

In future the purchase is expanded

Diese Formulierung geht so nicht. „in future“ (Es heißt übrigens entweder nur “future” oder “in the future”) besagt, zukünftig. Dann schreibst du „is expanded“. Das passt nicht, denn “is” ist Gegenwart. Nimm hier die Zukunftsform.

in even cheaper countries, too.

Der genaue Sinn des Satzes ist mir nicht klar. Meinst du, IKEA wird zukünftig seine Materialien in noch billigeren Ländern kaufen? Du solltest diesen Satz noch mal überarbeiten und ausformulieren.

Moreover, Ikea does not buy all materials of

Falsche Präposition: “to buy from”

the same manufacturer, but it also could be

besser: “but it is also possible”

that one product is manufactured by

Falsche Präposition: “to manufacture from”

materials from

Ich glaube, man kann hier auch “of” sagen

different countries


The immortality factor

The enterprise organisation

Ingvar Kamprad is being no more the owner of the IKEA Group today.

“…is no longer the owner..."

Ingvar Kamprad saw the future endangered of Ikea

Wort- und Stellungsfehler: “endangered” benutzt man eher für bedrohte Tierarten und “of IKEA muss weiter nach vorne: “I.K. saw the future of IKEA at risk“. Klingt aber nicht sehr schön. Wie wäre es mit: „I.K. saw a certain amount of risk fort he future of the IKEA enterprise,..“

, but he wanted that Ikea will remain an independent and immortal enterprise.

Beachte hier wieder die Zeitformen. Du hast „wanted“ als Zeitform der Vergangenheit und benutzt danach „will“ = Gegenwart. Das passt nicht zusammen und du kannst den Satz auch so nicht ausdrücken.
„… but he wanted IKEA to remain as an independent and immortal enterprise.”


Therefore he decided to transform the Ikea enterprise into a foundation. The foundation "Stichting INGKA foundation" is at the first job of this company structure.

Möchtest du sagen, an erster Stelle? Das sagt man anders mit „in the first place“.

Managing director of the "Stichting INGKA foundation" is Ingvar Kamprad. This foundation is the owner of the "INGKA Holding B.V.". The "INGKA Holding B.V." is in turn the parent company of all enterprises of the Ikea group and Swedwoods' production factories.
Today Ikea is an idea, a concept.

Wie jetzt? Idee oder Konzept?

This concept is in the possession of

Ohne “the”: “to be in possession of”

the company "Inter IKEA system B.V." with seat

Firmensitz bzw. Hauptsitz heißt “principal office” oder “headquarters“

in Holland. "Inter IKEA system B.V." was hence founded to sell usufructs

Was sind denn “usufructs”??? [kopfkratz3] Solltest du etwas mehr drüber sagen.

at the idea of Ikea. One of the largest franchisees is the Ikea group itself.

Ikea is the worldwide tallest tax saver

Wortstellung und “tall” passt nicht: “…biggest (oder “one of the most important tax savers”) tax saver worldwide”

Ingvar Kamprad tried to save taxes on the legal way

Besser: “by legal means”

so much

nicht “much”, sondern "intensively"  

so
“so” weglassen

that the wish of independence does not remain an illusion for Ikea.

“warum drückst du dich nicht positiv auf. Das macht den Satz einfacher und verständlicher:
„… that the wish of independence has become reality for the IKEA concern.”  


So, mach jetzt mal Schluss. Vielleicht macht ja jemand anders weiter.
LG, Claire


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Bezug
Letzter Teil Seminararbeit: Fälligkeit abgelaufen
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 04:39 Di 02.05.2006
Autor: matux

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